a splash of colour... quite literally, funny, humour, hypochondria, hysterically happy, ireland, not tesco, relativity

Colonocacophony

cof

Rarely will a colonoscopy be more heralded, advertised, discussed, trumpeted, feared, debated or planned down to the most minute details.

Carlos still has 7 days to psyche himself up.

He asked me to keep this to myself. But I have overheard him discussing it at length with the receptionist. And B from Accounts. And S from Sales. And half of the mesmerised engineering department. And the cleaning lady from the 3rd floor. And his sister on Skype. And more importantly her GP husband on the phone.

I thought I’d discreetly add a reminder on our corporate wall calendar. The one used for the only thing that truly matters in the Mistake Factory: the holidays.

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One life. Live it

like the selfish, wasteful bollix that you are…

The slogan fits the car so well.
You’ve never been snowed in. Not in Blackrock, no. You’ve never had to gather cattle in the Wicklow mountains.
You’ve never needed a big shaggin petrol guzzling 4×4.

95% of your mileage is done in the city center.

You have one life, and boy you are living it.

Like a tumor.

I don’t quite believe that you belong to the same species as the guys who built Newgrange.
You are one stage of evolution further.

On the path to oblivion.

4x4, cretins, dublin, dun laoghaire, iMbeciles, ireland, motoring, relativity, resting on stones is NOT comfortable, ribbed for your pleasure

One life. Live it

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The magic of Christmas?

Not quite sure what is wrong with us this year. We are pretty much on top of things. A Christmas tree has been procured. It smells like a Christmas tree. It’s full, and even, and lovely and dark green.

It cost the GDP of Lesotho but that’s beyond the point, isn’t it?
One does not put a price tag on the magic of Christmas. Or at least not an easily affordable one…

Anyway, who needs an extravagant Christmas dinner?
We’ll be fine, eating our yellow sticker ready meals (there’s usually shitloads of them in the Granny Aisle on the 23rd and 24th, people seem to feed exclusively on alcohol and cocktail sausages in the last three weeks up to Christmas) while watching our beautiful tree starting to droop ever so slightly.

a splash of colour... quite literally, art, considering putting my kids on eBay, dublin, essential parenting implements, Extraction of EUR60 from my wallet, ireland, love, parenting, photography, relativity

Can you feel it yet?

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Did shag all. Which was brilliant.
Slept loads. Which is exactly what the doctor ordered.

A most beautiful non-day.

art, close-up of my juicy plums, dejection, dublin, Extraction of EUR60 from my wallet, homemade festival in one's back garden, ireland, monochrome, photography, relativity, this is a swear-free zone, for fuck sake

A minimal sort of day

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When Darren invented camoball, he was pretty sure that he would rapidly become a millionaire.

But as the sales failed to materialise, he soon lost momentum.

He hit a wall.

abandon, art, dublin, funny, humour, ireland, miserable, photography, relativity

Fancy a game of camoball?

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The “do not pet me” message on his harness?
Nah, that’s a whole load of bollix.
Look at him. Look at how cute he is. Look at those fluffly fluffy soft ears.
Ats a boy. Ats a very cute, very cuddly boy.

Now, if you try to pet me, I’ll headbutt you, roight?

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art, astronomy in pyjamas, dublin, dun laoghaire, funny, humour, ireland, photography, relativity, seeing is believing, street photography

The what?

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a splash of colour... quite literally, art, dublin, dun laoghaire, homemade festival in one's back garden, ireland, nostrils, orange tape floating in the gentle May breeze, relativity, ribbed for your pleasure

Superbia pulchra est

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