dublin, dun laoghaire, not the sun, rain, tourism, travel

Rain? Check!

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Welcome to Ireland.

We would like to congratulate you on your choice of a Deluxe Drizzle Package.

Our rain is 100% reliable, with packages tailored to suit all budgets and needs.

Your own personal little rain cloud will escort you from 10 nautical miles east of Howth Head and it will stay with you for the duration of your stay, 24/7.

You can switch between the Light Drizzle and Dense Drizzle settings simply by clapping your hands.
Some hardcore enthusiasts even gather around turf fires in local inns to change their drizzle settings. They accompany their clapping with music and drinks and much merriment and call this a céilidh.

During you stay, you are entitled to one complimentary upgrade to Soaked Irish Barbecue.
There is no need to phone or email us in advance, or to clap your hands louder. Just crack open the pack of Galtee sausages or take a 5 kg bag of charcoal out of the boot of your car and the rain extravaganza will start automatically.

One Soaked Irish Barbecue offer per stay (1 January – 31 December). Cannot be used in conjunction with the Cycling Around Ireland in the Pissing Rain package. Terms and conditions apply.

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drinks, dublin, dun laoghaire, ireland, is gourmet burger an oxymoron?, life lesson, monochrome, parenting, portrait

Keeping it real

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That’s his mission statement.
And has been for the last 57 years. Well, 56.98 years.

Happy birthday Carlos.

You definitely have a picture in the attic.
And a case of Botox injections hidden under your bed.

But with the advancing years, Carlos has lost some of his vigilance. He never noticed the breach of security at his work station, or the diminishing level of carbonated water in his stash follow a raid by the Red Eyed Dwarf 

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drinks, dublin, ireland, life lesson, pub, sunny

Aux pintes, citoyens!

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Formez, vos bataillons!

What?! Could… could… could it really be a spontaneous citizen movement of insurrection?

Have the harassed people of Ireland finally decided that enough is enough, that the nationalisation of commercial debt was… well… just a little bit unfair, that they…

Oh no, shite, silly me… Today’s the first warm sunny day of the year and hundreds of thirsty punters are mobbing Keogh’s.

The rest hasn’t changed.
Baaaaah-NAMA Republic.
Shut the fuck up and pay little sheep…

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life lesson

The relativity of relativisation

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Contrarily to Monday’s squashed pigeon that marked the start of the improvement of my Monday (or at least the lessening of the gloom – I know, I am a heartless sick individual), a glimpse of this poor little bollix triggered a pang of sadness in me.

It took me the walk back home to figure out what was so distressing about this sad minuscule scene (the little naked punk bird couldn’t have been more than 3 centimeters long).

I decided that it was the nakedness of the little thing, which made it look so vulnerable.
And the brightness of the beak, a bright happy yellow ill-suited to a premature death.

And the fact that it is so incredibly cruel, when you were born hatched a bird, never to have experienced the exhilaration of flight.

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Feather light

The feather, not the overweight marine mammal lazily floating within sneezing distance.

On a side note, have you ever noticed how big seals’ nostrils are?
And how tight they manage to shut them?
Their nostril muscles are so impressive I wouldn’t be surprised if they could crack hazelnuts if you were to insert one up their nose and somehow get them to sneeze.
I wonder if there is a commercial application to this rare ability.

On a side side note, I always encourage the use of the French language with my kids (or to be totally honest, my wife once in a while nags me to speak more French to them), except when it comes to this marine mammal.

I have seen the look of utter horror on the disbelieving faces of the locals in Howth when the French kids call excitedly ‘Papa! Papa! J’ai vu un gros phoque’

Today’s weather: same as yesterday’s I guess, changeable

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Colour splash of the day: brought to you by Tesco, every little (splash of colour) helps

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dublin, dun laoghaire, french, ireland, life lesson, marine biology, nostrils

Feather light

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life lesson, mondays smell of dead pigeons, monochrome, relativity

Relativisation

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My Monday was displaying early and worrying signs of extreme poxitude*

But a good Samaritan-pigeon put me back on the right track.

My optimism dial is now somewhere between It-could-be-worse-you-could-be-a-flattened-pigeon and mildly melancholic.

* to name but a few: late Dart (as in later-than-usual Dart), rain, lingering smell of rehydrated vintage dog poo typical of wet concrete footpaths following an unusual week long dry spell

Today’s weather: changeable

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Answer to question that has bothered me for the last 40 odd years: Oui, Maman, les p’tits bateaux, y z’ont des jambes

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