activity park with a potato crisp theme, astronomy in pyjamas, bambi is not happy, cretins, dublin, dun laoghaire, funny, humour, ireland, photography, street photography

Out of the Darkness, into the Light

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I wish this were an allegory for my working day.

Unfortunately it wasn’t.

My working day was more along the lines of Out of the Darkness into an Even Darker Place, possibly a Pitch Black Headless Chickens Farm, and Walking into a Pile of Steaming Dung, because it was so Dark, and Wishing I had not been Barefoot.

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art, dublin, Dublin Area Rapid Transport... rapid my arse, funny, humour, iarnrod up your arse little commuter, ireland, photography, relativity, seeing is believing, SEO

Search Engine Oh-my-god…

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… SNOW!!! Four flakes of it flying horizontally into Dublin Bay… We are all doomed!!!

Padraic has been Search Engine Operator for Iarnrod Eireann for 27 years. 
Every morning, he searches for the electric engines on the Dart trains, whispers reassuring words to them, caresses the control console and switches the power on. 
And then carefully hands them over to a grumpy driver who will push them to their limit (42 mph in the long straight between Clontarf and Killester) until the next tea break and game of cards at the depot (the grumpiness comes from the worrying frequency of the bouts of driving expected of them between tea breaks…) 
Today Padraic loss the run of himself when he saw the four flakes.
He panicked. 

My train was 45 minutes late this morning. 
Due to “operational issues at Connolly Station”. The guy with the nasal voice who has been on tannoy duty since he got his noise broken by the irate-mother-whose-kid-was-lost-on-a-train-to-Laytown is always careful not to hurt Padraic’s feelings.
His phobia of snow flakes (or leaves on the track) is always euphemistically referred to as “operational issues”. 

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alvin and the shaggin chipmonks, art, astronomy in pyjamas, bambi is not happy, dublin, ireland, Jehovah prosecutors, nana is packing, orange tape floating in the gentle May breeze

Gone apeshit

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No they have not.
Not Mrs Mememe2U and Nana and the kids.

But the chimps from Dawn of the Planet of the Planet of the Apes have.

Gone apeshit.

Which was a fitting transition from my work week.

Jayzus, there were a lot of people going apeshit.

What is wrong with the world?

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a splash of colour... quite literally, art, cretins, disgruntled, dublin, dun laoghaire, funny, humour, iMbeciles, ireland

Endangered species

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Things are tough for Ryan.
He finds it harder every week to make a dishonest living.
He is a Payphone-vandal-scumbag like his dad before him, and his dad before that.
But the disappearance of his main source of subsistence means that he has to travel further afield to keep the family trade alive.
His dad John-Paul retired 5 years ago.
Ryan now fears that the trade will die when he himself is forced into early retirement.
He is quite certain that by the time his little Calum is old enough to hurl a building brick at a payphone, the latter will have well and truly become extinct.

Ryan and Calum, and the few remaining Payphone-vandal-scumbags out there need your help.

For the modest sum of EUR12.75 per minute (subject to a connection fee of EUR25), you too could use the few remaining examples of a proud tradition of antique telephony devices, instead of your boring smartphone, and make Eircom rethink their phasing out of the old payphones.

The future of little Calum depends on you.

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